Sticky Beak
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The Skinny
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...life in small Northern towns, working for assholes, boys who refuse to become men, synthetic personalities, anorexic models and their link to emotional scarring, bad marijuana trips, crazies on BC Transit, beer, piece of shit cars, living out of a suitcase paycheck to paycheck, unrequited love, Seinfeld, minimum-wage jobs, broken New Year�s resolutions, and over-limit Visa accounts.
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Ghoulies, Ghosties and Long-Legged Beasties... Did I mention that my sister�s house is haunted? Well, I can�t say this for certain, having never witnessed anything first hand (touch wood), but I have heard plenty of testimony from sis and kids. I generally don�t like to think of myself as superstitious, but who the hell am I trying to kid? I�m a freak show. Full on. I don�t walk under ladders, try to avoid stepping on cracks, cling to my St. Christopher and repeat the Lord�s Prayer about 80 times whenever I�m taking off or landing in an airplane, and I definitely believe in ghosts. Too many people I know and trust have sworn to experiencing these things for me to harbour much doubt. So here I am, alone in this room, my bedside light on, desperately trying to remain rational and keep my heartbeat under control as I lay here thinking, �What the hell was that? Did I cast that shadow? What was that sound??? Oh god� is that� the entity? (grab the St. Chris) Our Father, who art in heaven�� Yeah, it�s all pretty funny considering that I�m agnostic-bordering-on-atheist. Never mind� I�m not really breaking any agnostic/atheist guidelines by keeping my St. Chris as a lucky talisman; the poor sod was de-canonized anyway (if that�s a word). I�m a walking contradiction. But then again, that�s obvious seeing as I�m female. To make matters worse, when I mentioned to Melanie that I occasionally smelled a foul odour � like rotting flesh � in my room and wondered whether there was garbage outside under my window, she replied �No, but apparently entities give off odours�� Oh, well. Isn�t that wonderful. So glad I know that. Bloody Hell! |