Sticky Beak
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The Skinny
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...life in small Northern towns, working for assholes, boys who refuse to become men, synthetic personalities, anorexic models and their link to emotional scarring, bad marijuana trips, crazies on BC Transit, beer, piece of shit cars, living out of a suitcase paycheck to paycheck, unrequited love, Seinfeld, minimum-wage jobs, broken New Year�s resolutions, and over-limit Visa accounts.
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A failure of imagination... There are so many things I want to write about tonight... where to begin? Well, it's been a while since I gave a report on Bucky's, so maybe that's where I should start. After a decade of sitting on my ass for a living, I'm back in retail and honestly... I'd forgotten how fecking exhausting it is to be on your feet all day long. My heels are absolutely vibrating and radiating heat; feels like I have ten thousand little cactus spurs in each foot. I worked a whopping 7.5 hours today, and I literally had to drag myself home and up the stairs to my loft where I then proceeded to promptly pass out for 2 hours. And did I mention that I worked with a truckload of freakish people today??? Holy Christ. Yeah, the tail-chaser was there again, although he was actually pretty calm. I've obviously stumbled upon a very elite group of coffee-servers, and apparently I'm yet to enter their secret guild because most of them refuse to speak to me. Hell, some of them flat out ignore me when I say 'hello'. I feel like I'm back in high school and sitting on the cusp of the 'cool kid' group. So close, and yet so far. The tail-chaser called me in for a 4 hour shift yesterday... I wasn't exactly impressed, but what can you do? So, I dragged my ass out of bed yesterday, showered, dressed, walked the 20 minutes to Bucky's and when I get there... another shift-lead advises me that the tail-chaser called in 3 people when he only needed to call one, so they spun me on my heel and sent me home. Hey, no dramas here! I was only too happy to retreat. Particularly since I would have been working with members of the dreaded evening shift (those guys are the worst for cliquey behaviour). Sooooo, that's Bucky's. Yippeee-ki-yay. (*yawn* I'm so tired, I could sleep forever.) My new nephew Kai is on the way... he'll be here any day within the next 2 weeks, the doctor figures. As excited as I am to meet him, I have to admit that I'm a little bummed out to lose pregnant Ayumi... she's so much fun to tease and so very entertaining to watch! She has this walk - more of a scurry, really - where she looks like a penguin, tilting side to side and moving incredibly fast but without actually lifting her feet off the ground. I can't explain it, but it's absolutely hysterical to watch. And the belly. My god, the belly. Frickin' hysterical. This thing is massive, probably comprising a good half of Ayumi's total mass, and it's so perfectly round. Her belly-button popped out about 5 months ago, and peeks out through her t-shirts like a door-bell, which causes me to (BING BONG) ring it whenever I get the chance... an action which inevitably results in a very stern "HEY! DON'T!" (Smack!). She's little, but she packs one hell of a punch... In other news... things with my Australian friend continue to progress, and I continue to fall deeper and deeper down the rabbit hole. In fact, I'm planning a trip to visit him next month... I know, I know... don't worry, I've already been thoroughly lectured and warned by many a concerned friend and surrogate-mother. The truth remains that this is unlike anything I've experienced before in my life, and for once I feel like the gods have taken note of this endless purgatory called my life and are finally smiling down on me in a moment of reprieve. I'll take it. Regardless of whether it plays out to last 5 weeks or 50 years, I'm riding this wave and leaving my water-wings on the shore. They've never done me any good up to now... And yet the gods continue to tease and baffle us by constantly throwing the order of balance back in our faces... I've come to notice that the world operates in a truly Yin Yang fashion; in order for one person to experience bliss, another person must suffer. Or maybe it's just when I'm happy that the whole order of the universe is turned upside down and results in this strange phenomenon. Whatever the reason, my new found euphoria is tainted by a sadness for friends and family who are currently struggling with bruised hearts, broken homes, and suffocating loneliness. I wish I could break off a piece of my happiness and share it with them - surely there has to be enough love in this world to feed everyone? Are there no second helpings? The meaning of the words 'fair' and 'justice' has long-since expired, I fear; can they be used at all anymore? Is today Sunday? Or is it Monday? I've lost all track of time, days... anything that has some relationship with order seems to have escaped me lately. I think I've contracted Kris & Ayumi's lethargy and addiction to sleep... osmosis? Hmmmm. What a wonderful life...
Have I covered everything I wanted to talk about today???.... hmmm... I don't think so. There is still the Great Hair Mishap of 2005, speed-dating trauma, redneck motels and other miscellaneous topics to touch upon - but I think we'll have to save those for another night, children. I bought a piece of art yesterday. It can only be described as art because it's so very odd, boasts a crazy, ridiculous child-like drawing and yet I paid more for it than it was worth - and isn't that the true definintion of art? I couldn't resist it, though... the words jumped off the paper and blocked my throat... the angel shrugged and said 'if we fail this time it will be a failure of imagination...' and then she placed the world gently in the palm of my hand." |